Prayer For The UnMother
Why, God, why?
How could she?
How could she not have the love for them?
As my womb bleeds, it is for nothing!
No child can ever grow there.
She disposes of them as if they were
Battered old trinkets that she lost interest for.
My heart skips a beat when I hear a child's cry.
It is the cry that says,
"I am alive and depend solely on your love."
Did she even understand when she heard their
Last gargling cry?
To have only one child fall asleep while sucking
His nourishment from my breast. . .
How could she look at them reaching for her and
Swim away to safety?
Couldn't she hear the deafening silence of their
Blood curdling chokes?
I dream of them, strapped in their car seats,
Reaching. . .
Their lungs breathe in more water, and
Terror is in their wide eyes. . .
Until their skin turns blue and the
Blood flows from their eyes, ears, and mouths,
Still screaming "Mommy. . ."
And all I can do is hold these corpses to my breast,
And beg them to suck my love with their bloody mouths.
But all they do is sleep with their lifeless eyes
Still open.
I finally lay us down in our coffins
As my womb aches.
Why, God, why?
How could she?
© Crystal Dawn, All rights reserved.
Used by permission.
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